[GreenKeys] 28 ASR's to Dump

[Lawless, Loveless & Childress]

 >>>/ I'm going to cry now. (You're kidding about ASRs to the dump, right?)

/I lack sufficient imagination to make that up. After driving around 
Florida (Naples to Miami tp Tallahassee to Pensacola) for two days in a 
van with a refrigerator dolly and staying two nights in motels and 
taking two days off from work, removing eight 28 ASR's from 
stockbrokers' offices (and I mean these were PRISTENE!) and regearing 
them from 75 Baud to 45.5, I couldn't find a single ham in SW Florida 
who was interested in taking a machine for free, even if I, at my 
further expense, delivered them to their QTH's and hooked them up.

Since I already had two Kleinschmidts and a 28 KSR, and a 35 RO in the 
shack, I had a choice: add a room onto my house or dispose of them. 
Especially since the (then) XYL's car was now in the driveway and a 
squadron of Teletypes was in her garage spot. (On later consideration, I 
divined that 28 ASR's were more amusing and useful than she, but that's 
another story.)

The excuses were: "My wife wouldn't like it." Or, "They make too much 
noise." Also, "I'm afraid it'll leak oil on my carpeting." (Like it's an 
antique Harley?)

And, my favorite: "I'm gonna get on RTTY with my computer." This last 
from a transplanted VE3 who I knew to be technically incapable of 
jump-starting a 1963 Ford Fairlane without ruining the alternator or 
blowing up the battery.

TTY for the Deaf wasn't interested.

My county government (Collier County, FL) was constructing an artificial 
reef at the time near Marco Island, so I loaded them into a borrowed 
(again) van and personally loaded them onto an LCMP that they used to 
carry metal junk out into the Gulf of Mexico, bidding them a fond, 
"Farewell."

I assume that these gems failed the Float Test and are, even as we 
speak, providing homes for poor, underprivileged grouper and redfish.

Now, when I order Grouper Parmegiana, I imagine that I'm consuming fish 
spawned in a Digitally-Enhanced hatchery...